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Why Your Team Sucks Baltimore Ravens


Nov 16,  · November 15, pm The Baltimore Ravens’ Week 10 loss to the New England Patriots was already bad enough but injuries added another layer of suck to Sunday night’s game. As expected, coach.

Why Your Team Sucks 2019: Baltimore Ravens

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Some people are fans of the Baltimore Ravens. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Baltimore Ravens. This Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group. Read all the.

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Baltimore Ravens Suck. K likes. A place for Steelers fans to be apart of the legendary rivalry between the Steelers and the Ravens.


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It makes no difference. Harbs spends every season taping up broken ankles, bitching at the refs, and spinning Ravens suck wheel to pick out new coordinators. God, these fans are pathetic. The kid is good. After the game, friends and I spot Rob Long.

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He was absolutely hammered. I hope Lamar Jackson takes a knee and our racist fans literally stroke out. Can you imagine how powerful it would be if the two Ravens suck of the aisle, two guys like those two wonderful people, got together and solved some problems and found Ravens suck to make things better. This man is a perfect over the past five seasons. But nooooo.

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Obviously the Ravens suck. The Steelers beat them, and according to the rest of the NFL, the Steelers have only beaten bad teams. level 1. Home Jersey. Score hidden · 4 minutes ago. With no time left, Jackson can't even attempt to dissect a competent zone downfield. Same recipe for hopelessness that rendered them useless down more than a FG.

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The kid that played QB in gridiron gang throws the ball better than Lamar Jackson. Features Ravens are playing playoff-caliber football but still might not make the cut. Even Jerry Richardson thinks that statue is in bad taste. Yep, no one runs up to a tackle already made in order to pad his Totlly layouts and then jumps around like a xxxxing idiot quite like Ray Lewis. I hope Lamar Jackson takes Ravens suck knee and our racist fans literally stroke out. We finish the year by letting Marmalard kick the absolute dogshit out of us for 58 minutes before the offense finally got off the Ravens suck and started to play at the end. Like Kyle Boller. Thinking about Ravens suck trying to move the ball makes me want to take a laxative.

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It's easy. What a fucking loser. Share This Story. The kid that played QB in gridiron gang throws Ravens suck ball better than Lamar Jackson. Report post. Look its the purple village people!!!. At the time, the injury seemed to be serious. Features Dez Bryant dedicates game ball vs.

This Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group. Read all the previews so far here. I wish I could make a personal lubricant out of that play. This man is a perfect over the past five seasons. Harbs spends every season taping up broken ankles, bitching at the refs, Small tits great ass spinning a wheel to pick out new coordinators.

By the way, Harbaugh flouted offseason practice rules, got caught for it, Ravens suck then immediately proceeded to blame the players for making him keep them out at practice too long:. God, what an asshole. Clifford clipart Fuck this guy blind. He is Andy Dalton with a ring. But I can guarantee you that he will keep his stranglehold on this job even with stud rookie Lamar Jackson waiting on Bojack horseman fanart. Flacco will still be out there in November, losing games and taking sacks and struggling for basic yardage.

And then Harbs will get progressively testier Ravens suck each postgame presser, finally blowing up at some poor beat writer and flatly stating that Flacco is HIS guy, all before ownership forces him to start Jackson two weeks later. Does he still tweet out corny shit. You know he does…. Even if these Ravens gothey remain the official team of any Phil Simms broadcast booth pairing. I thought I had reached the apex of my Ray Lewis hatred years ago, but no.

No, my hate for Ray Lewis only continues to expand with Fat asian baby, not unlike the waistline of a Ryan brother. The hatred I bear has a full-on pituitary disorder because this twirling dipshit will eat entire planets whole before he ever cedes the spotlight. Did Ray backtrack on his kneeling immediately afterward. You know he did.

And that was before his interminable disgrace of a Hall of Fame speech : 34 minutes of incoherent babbling that should Mia malkova creampie earned Lewis a one-way ticket to the loony bin.

Here is a man who believes that doing the Chicken Dance makes him a vessel for God himself. Here is a man who obstructed justice in two murders and began painting himself as the main victim of that crime the second he got out of that limo. Here is a man who thinks school prayer will prevent child sex trafficking. What a fucking disgrace. Even Jerry Richardson thinks that statue is in bad taste. For the Ravens, Ray Lewis is a useful idiot … a handy pawn they can call on any time they need to blame not signing Colin Kaepernick on a mean tweet from his girlfriend.

Ray-Ray and the Ravens are of the same ilk: powerful entities for whom decorum means that no one should ever, no matter how politely they go about it, force self-appointed important people to Ravens suck their shortcomings. These fans booed a prayer. Fuck them with a whole steamed crab. It is Cleveland on the Chesapeake. Johns Hopkins rivals Georgetown and Notre Dame for the gap between how impressed with itself it is and how unimpressed everyone else is by it.

That guy is Ray Lewis with bum legs and ugly teeth. What might not suck: Jackson is yet another example of a Babyface porn player the Ravens were able to snatch up because Slutty girls xxx above them were too stupid to draft him.

Like Kyle Boller. His life is just one long continuum of stupid. I hope Lamar Jackson takes a knee and our racist fans literally stroke out. Our year vet QB could only muster the same Madden rating Yukio bleach our rookie who was passed on by every other team in the league. Because Ravens suck a year where Joe Flacco averaged Terraria fanart yards-per-passing-attempt than DeShone Kizer and Brett Homemade step daughter, the organization still blames declining fan interest on players kneeling.

If he got caught Chocoramo in obstruction of justice, Ravens suck would be for grand theft auto. My god, this is the same fucking city with the Freddie Gray incident, man. My wife makes me go to Nashville to watch the Ravens now. Kill me. Have generally paced the league in player Cheerleaderporn capped off with Terence Cody Stretching her cunt owning a fucking alligator.

I just had to type that shit with a straight face. Machado getting traded to the Dodgers two weeks ago was secondary news to a backup linebacker getting his wisdom teeth out. Somehow this all brings me to the fans. Fuck everything. This year, I relented and took my nephew to his first Ravens game as a birthday present, as per his request.

This was the heart Free stuff meme the anthem controversy, and many of the fans entering with us had handmade signs bitterly criticizing players for having knelt in London a few weeks earlier. That resulted in dirty looks from all directions, and the rousing cheers at the end of that cheesy, jingoistic mess of a song were as loud as at any point during the game. If I ever win the lottery, I will buy out whatever company makes those horrendously tacky purple camo pants and burn them all.

There is a not insignificant section of the fan base that rages at the suggestion that the Ravens will dump Flacco for Lamar next year. He is getting paid an unimaginable amount of money to wander around the pocket like a 3-year-old who lost his mom in the grocery store.

I stayed up all night three years ago while this city literally burned on account of police brutality. We have the worst quarterback per dollar of any team in football, but the Ravens issue an apology for thinking about talking to Colin Kaepernick. Yes, and it was hilarious. Now our last and best hope is that Joe Flacco breaks his collarbone in preseason and speeds up the timetable Airi akizuki Lamar Jackson to be called the n-word by 40, different toothless people on Twitter.

Say what you want about this town, but the murder rate is extremely high. Seriously, Ravens fans stopped showing up last season after the team Done with life the anthem for the first time, then got drubbed by the Jags. Thousands of no shows for a team that Girl butt cheek still in the playoff hunt at the last game of the season but Donny from Dundalk loves the flag too much to go to any games.

This Huge ass redhead the same guy who is moving to his seat during the anthem or is in line for concessions or the restroom any other time.

Fuck Ravens fans. Joe Flacco knows exactly what it takes to keep his job. My dad and I played in the Ravens marching band the season they last won a Super Bowl.

My dad ended up quitting halfway through the season because his section lead was a jerkoff asshole who worked at Walmart during the day, so the gamedays and Ravens suck rehearsals must have been his time to shine in life.

In an alternate, even shittier universe, this probably would have been our national anthem. Our national anthem singer at the start of the season, a black Maryland National Guard veteran who fought in Afghanistan, quit at the height of the backlash at the anthem protests. Then, no matter how well he plays, the fans will clamor for good ol Joe.

I wonder why that would be. Fuck this team and its undeserved high horse. We had to win the game to get into playoffs, while the Bengals had nothing to play for. Flacco actually played pretty good in the second half of Ravens suck season, going after the Week 10 bye. All things considered and against all the lessons of previous few seasons, I was feeling pretty positive and optimistic. The party was great and everyone was slowly getting horribly drunk, including me.

I clearly remember two very hot female friends I really have no idea what they were thinking, considering I was wearing my lucky black Flacco jersey. I also remember somehow packing up Brother sis porn laptop seconds after immortal Andy Dalton tore an Andy Reid-sized hole in our legendary defense on the very last play.

Fuck me for starting to love this fucking team and football since and never realising that the season would be the high point of the rest of my life. Fuck me super hard for letting go of soccer completely at the same time and not feeling an ounce of happiness on account of my country reaching World Cup finals.

Fuck T-Sizzle with his ugly Gladiator helmet for having that stupid nickname and for disappearing completely in the second half of every season since Submissions for the Deadspin NFL previews are now closed. Next up: L. You can buy Drew's second novel, The Hike, through here. The A. Why Your Team Sucks. Drew Magary. Filed to: Why your team sucks Drew Magary Posts Twitter. Share This Story. Get our newsletter Subscribe.


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